Showing posts with label bgltqi. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bgltqi. Show all posts

5.14.2010

the black love crisis (4)

our dear friend sparkle has also weighed in on the conversation. why we love her take?

nobody that i know of, with the exception of the ladies at crunk feminist collective, has mentioned that queer (by queer i mean lesbians, bisexual, pan/omnisexual, trans, intersex) self-identified black women aren’t considered in this conversation. again: we are not a monolith. you can’t have this conversation without considering the fact that the women being discussed are hetero, cisgender (not trans women — trans ppl are invisible in virtually every conversation about marriage, and just about everything else), & at the very least hold bachelor’s degrees. because ppl who don’t finish college don’t matter in this conversation, no matter what they’re doing w/ themselves, unless it’s to count them as undesirables. further, who’s to say that marriage is everyone’s goal or ideal? it could be argued that “we aren’t talking about those people,” but if that’s the case then it must be stated so from the onset of each conversation regarding unmarried black women of certain income levels and sexual orientations. period. know your audience.

...and that's just the third paragraph.

read on, beloveds!.

11.02.2009

quickie!

shaker kiriamaya breaks down what's wrong with julie bindel and other transphobic folks.

10.26.2009

quickie!

beyond marriage.org.  because it's time to shift the paradigm.

{thanks to nueva_voz for the link}

8.29.2009

baby makes me

the woman who brought you the black./womyn. project and fly poet staceyann chin are collaborating on a new project, baby makes me.

here is their call for participants and support, as seen on sparkle's blog...

PLEASE POST ON YOUR BLOGS, SITES, LISTS etc. Help us reach the folks we need.

Many of you have already heard about our film, Baby Makes me. For you, this is an update. But for the folks who have not heard Tiona and I are making a documentary together.

For years, I have wanted to become a mother. But the timing has never been quite right. Either my partners weren’t ready, or I was scared, or I couldn’t find a donor or something. There was always something. By the time I rolled into 35, I was tired of being afraid, tired of waiting for the right woman with whom it would be the right time, tired of watching every Christmas roll over another Birthday, tired of watching my peers get knocked up and months later appear with the most amazing little bundle of potential—I was tired of waiting and ready to make the leap, and I was ready to make it alone.

I began the research with great heart—only to discover that there were little no resources for women who either wanted to, or had to embark on the journey of motherhood in the solo. There were one or two essays and a few books on artificial insemination, and some were even directed at lesbians—but most, if not all assumed that the mother would be operating from inside of a partnership, be that partnership heterosexual or homosexual.

The idea for the film came out of a conversation with Tiona to film the pregnancy/labor, assuming that there would be one—because no one, least of all me, knows if my body will cooperate in doing such a thing as conceiving. I envisioned Tiona asking a couple of heartfelt questions and spinning the light to create a high-end home-movie I could show my child at eighteen. She agreed and we began to flesh out some ideas. That conversation, coupled with the lack of resource material out there spurred the project now known as Baby Makes Me.

Baby Makes Me, a feature-length documentary, will explore the challenges and triumphs of Single Motherhood, particularly in the lives of women of color, lesbians and women who make a conscious choice to be mothers in the absence of intimate/romantic partnerships with men.

The film will use as its narrative skeleton, the journey of activist/writer/performer, Staceyann Chin, as she navigates her personal choices with reference to motherhood. Author of the memoir, The Other Side of Paradise, Chin now brings her talents to the medium of film as writer and Executive Producer.

The Director, Tiona McClodden, is a champion of promoting positive images of women in media. Her last film, “Black./womyn.:conversations…”, garnered much respect in both accolades and awards. She now brings her attention to the issue of women and motherhood.

It is our intent to interview a series of women from all the demographic cross-sections. Issues of financial, ethical, medical, cultural, and political relevance will be fore-grounded. We hope that clinics, hospitals, families, children of Black lesbians, straight Black women who want children, mothers of gay women who lament the loss of grandchildren when they discover their daughters are gay, and anybody who seeks to have a clearer picture of the family that includes gay women will see that our lives go on, that women who are single, be they lesbian, or Black or poor, can and do have babies, and that we are simply another group of people who live and laugh and grow. We hope to paint the subjects in the film as human and likable characters who, though they are dealing with slightly different challenges than the women we traditionally see as mothers, are not very different from any other group of people considering parenthood.

We are going to need all the help we can get. We need help in reaching out to folks who would like to be interviewed; other single mothers, women who have been inseminated, women who are thinking about it, women who work in the medical field, women who work in the administrative world of policy etc. We are on the hunt for the all the voices that could represent our story in the film.

We have recently been awarded a grant from ASTREA Lesbian Foundation for Justice and are set to move forward. We write to you now, in the hope that you will want to be involved in this groundbreaking project in whatever capacity you choose: we need space to host fundraisers and screening and other events connected to the film. We need people to fundraise, to promote the film, to host community talks, to suggest topics for discussion in the film—we need to secure additional investors, we need the help of people who are experts in the business of making films, and we need the counter-perspective of people who have never made a film. We are hoping to make this a community effort; from start to finish we want the ideas to be representative of the various factions in our diverse village of the women who mother our children. If you are sure you are unable to do any of the above, we only ask that you make room for our fliers, questionnaires, invitations, and other promotional materials for the film.

We would be honored if you would join us as we attempt to break more ceilings, level more walls to make room those of us who are too frequently left out of the history and imagination of the world we live in. We look forward to a spirited journey with you, from the opening shot to the ending credits—complete with your name listed among the most stalwart of our supporters.

Thanks again to the women who have already offered assistance. We look forward to your being a part of our process.

Staceyann Chin
Executive Producer/Writer, “Baby Makes Me”
Tiona McClodden
Director/Producer, “Baby Makes Me”

Please send all inquiries and requests to: babymakesme@gmail.com

8.25.2009

pause police

do we really need more reason to fear different expressions of sexuality and human beingness?

apparently the pause police think so.

while some stuff is just hilarious, the low level homophobia is tired.

be different, black people, and you could get called out!

{sigh}

for two sugar-approved treatments of the "no homo" issue, please enjoy the videos below.




5.03.2009

sexy news

got penis questions? read this.

masters & johnson book hits the shelves.

clearly, gay marriage won't work. clearly. {wtf? those are some wack "facts"}

finally - a decently realistic look at love.

nuns teaching abstinence. guess that's not news...

4.12.2009

sexy news: special edition - amazon fail

everyone's suddenly twittering about this amazon.com situation.

apparently "adult themed" books no longer have their sales rankings posted. the problem is, even glbtq lifestyle/family-oriented titles are getting caught in the net.

hm.

cnet has some more detailed information. feministe is talking about it, too.

according to urbantantrika, you can call 1-800-201-7575 if you'd like to speak to amazon directly about this action.

update: it seems this could have been the result of an overzealous computer program or human error.

12.24.2008

quickie!

good for canada!

can somebody show me an american health-related site with this kind of inclusivity (colleges and unitarians don't count...)?


12.23.2008

sexy news

typically we don't like to highlight the negative, but these two things bore mentioning this morning...

apparently turning gays straight is like saving the rainforest. really?

because that always "turns" 'em...doesn't it? lesbian gang raped in california.


12.22.2008

know thyself

today we felt compelled to share this beautiful discourse on love by ms. b.l.u of organik b.l.u.

this was originally posted on myspace, but you can also find this collective and its creatrix at organikblu.com or join their ning network.

~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~~*~*~

You cannot fully experience love in this life until you know what love is. To "Know Thyself" means to know it at every level, not just your physical and emotional levels. From this foundation you can then truly begin your journey towards a fulfilling relationship with one or many souls.

Every single one of you is a perfect being of love within. We are equal and loving beings who hold the potential to share this love with anyone we so choose. This being understood, let's erase a universal mistake in human thinking: "To have love, we must find love." There is no finding love, only expressing love! To find love suggests we are currently without it, and this is impossible for we are light beings, which are all love.

Let me give you an example of this. We all wake up from time to time and feel happiness or joy at the world (some people feel this all the time, and some once in a lifetime). We bounce out of bed and greet people with more love expressed. Now, we really know the world certainly did not grow more beautiful overnight! What happened is you allowing yourself to let your love flow from within. That is all.

Two or more people do not create love, only express it, depending on their own ability to let love flow from within themselves. You cannot create what already exists in its entirety. What appears to be created is really just two people sharing what is already within themselves and the end result is called a relationship. Ịf one is unable to feel love, it is because he or she is blocking what is within them. Then they mistakenly blame the other person for not being lovable or for creating this block.

The highest mind shares their inner love and takes responsibility for their own inability to feel that love. Do not confuse unlovable behavior with your own inability to express love. The people around you are always doing unloving behavior for they are not aware of their own inner love to some degree. This is why we were given the ability to have children. For this was as close as many of us would get to dealing with unlovable behavior (not following rules, outbursts, unreasonable behavior, etc.) and still expressing love! We could start to see what the expressing of unconditional love looked like. But you create this same situation in a relationship between adults, and bam, the "love" is seemingly gone. It is never gone, just utterly repressed and blocked. We were also given Spiritual Masters in order to observe their unfettered expression of love: Christ and Buddha are two examples. Their ability simply came from seeing all of us as "children" of God. While they may not love our behavior, they never stop loving us. This is Christ Consciousness love.

The reason that the term soul mate is skewed in concept is that people think they can only feel that love with one special person. In fact, they go through life looking for this soul mate and often end it in grave disappointment and reflect this disappointment with less than loving behavior towards their current mate. If we were unfettered with all of our veils, we could love completely anyone. When I go out in public, I do not say, "I will not treat this person with love because they are not my friend, family, or lover." I treat them with the same respect and love as I would my dearest friend, for underneath it all, and at the highest level, they are.

If we were to speak of something that feels like a soul mate love, or a split apart, it is generally this: People can spend many lives and dimensions together by choice. Through these lives they start to resonate more closely with each other. A history is created, and deeply seated emotions are built. Each subsequent life, their ties grow stronger and their desire to be with each other builds and it subconsciously returns. Because what we resonate with we attract, we inevitably will be thrown into each other's paths on this plane. Best friends, extremely close siblings, and yes, even your closest lover, are often these people. I refer to these people as being from the same "soul group." Clusters of souls that resonate with each other, and seek their own company over and over. And within these soul groups can be the closest thing to a soul mate, which is two souls holding the highest desire to express their inner love with each other. You could say this is a soul group within a soul group.

I am speaking ideals here. This is what I, and all of us, hope to aspire to. Do I make mistakes? Or course, and I still do in abundance. But I keep these ideals in my heart and strive for them daily. I am constantly adjusting myself to reflect my higher self. I like to say I'm a Work In Progress! I do get to witness the success of this every so often. I have this girlfriend by the name of Trina that was and is in my soul group. The moment we met, we resonated like I had never resonated with a human being. We chose to be together in every way, including working in the same office at Microsoft for three years! I loved her with no conditions and no blocks. No matter what she said, did or didn't do in our relationship, I loved her. Because of her own blocks and feelings of guilt, she withdrew from much of her circle of acquaintances (including me) and I have not seen her in years. My friends always ask why I keep her picture around the house for she has abandoned me, but I tell them that I love her without conditions. It doesn't matter what she does, only that I love her. Now, while she has shut me out on a physical level, she cannot do this on a subtle level. Her awareness is not yet developed, but mine is. I see her all the time in the higher planes and we talk for hours and she tells me what she is doing. Our desire to be together, as a soul group member, supersedes any conscious block that she has created. And when I come back from a visit with her, I will hear through the grapevine exactly what she was telling me personally in these other places. So you see, her love is always there, but her ability to let it flow became restricted. And yes, I may never see her again in this life, but I know for sure we will in the next....

So remember, you are a being of light comprised of love. To know love is to know thyself. If you seek outside of yourself, it should be to share, not to find.


12.09.2008

sexy news

what we've known all along: joy is contagious!

the economy's bad for lovin'.

a good analysis of female objectification in films.

we have forgotten more than we think: homophobia is the european construct, not homosexuality.



12.07.2008

quickie!

the love art lab

a wonderful example of making love happen, no matter what.



11.21.2008

11.14.2008

sexy news

priest refuses communion for obama voters...whatever happened to rendering unto caesar and all that?

lesbians in malaysia speak out...makes you wonder what the indigenous/original cultural response to gblt folks was...

score one for pleasure! mexico's giving out free viagra! (watch out for that blue vision, tho)

looks like this discovery came too late, but lip magazine still has a ton of goodies on their site...

what's it gonna take??!?!?! have the talk already...tyra episode highlights risky teen behavior.



11.10.2008

quickie!

keith, you get a standing ovation for this one.

it's all about the love, baby.